1. Other people's tongues are not for touching.
2. Your brother's head is not for climbing on.
3. Splashing is fun, but not in the toilet. (If we hadn't been in such a hurry to stop it, we'd have pictures.)
4. Your milk bottle doesn't like being on the floor.
5. Whatever it is, you don't have to eat it or throw it on the walls.
And several more in an essay called "Lamentations of the Father," way funnier than these.